Meanwhile on Twitter...

*whistles*

“I thought he was dead!” - Coulson about Loki, everyone else about Coulson lmfao 

Loki and Coulson seeing the other is still alive:

“I thought you were dead!”

“I killed you!”

“Thor said you were dead!!”

“Sceptre right through the sternum!!”

“I recovered.”

“Well so did I.”

“Touché. Carry on.”

“Hm.”

Westworld did this as well. Storytelling is dead!

IF FAN THEORIES ARE RIGHT IT IS A SIGN YOU HAVE TOLD A WELL-PUT TOGETHER AND FOLLOWABLE PLOT, NOT A SIGN YOU NEED TO MAKE UP SOME BULLSHIT FOR A TWIST ENDING.

FUCK OFF WITH THIS SHIT.

No wait, I’m not done here:

If the fans get where you are going and ARE STILL HAPPY, you KEEP GOING THERE. It shows they’re invested and your story craft is setting up and paying off properly. 

It is not a sign you need to M Night Shamaylan things until narrative is fuckin dead and “surprise endings!” reign supreme. If no one can guess what will happen, you don’t have a plot, you have deus ex machinas strung together like a child’s macaroni necklace. It might be endearing and beloved but its hardly a fuckin masterpiece. 

To be utterly frank, this is where “NO SPOILERS! NO SPOILERS EVER! NO ONE IS ALLOWED TO BREATHE ABOUT THE PLOT UNTIL IT’S BEEN OUT ON DVD FOR FIVE YEARS” attitude has left us – And the studios ACTIVELY encourage that shit because first week viewing numbers are their whole lifeblood.

Sure, an “oh shit” moment is great, but if you’re doing it well, I should have that moment watching the show the second, fifth, or hundredth time, knowing how it will go. If being surprised were truly so important to a narrative, why even make a Shakespeare play? Is anyone out there still hoping Romeo and Juliet still get together at the end? Why make mystery novels into movies? Spoiler warning: Hercules Poirot gets the bad guy. Movies that directly follow historical events? Clearly worthless.

Come on, now. Sure, try not to spoil shit for people intentionally, don’t be a dick, but can we calm the fuck down and can Hollywood stop pushing this shit both in social media and with business choices like this?

I saw something about this the other day in regards to adapting Murder on the Orient Express. At this point, almost anyone remotely interested in Agatha Christie’s work knows how Murder on the Orient Express ends, one of her biggest twist endings. So why keep making new adaptations? For the performances! For the storytelling!

Why do folk tales and folk heroes survive hundreds, even thousands of years? Because we connect with them. And they connect us with each other. This new concept of always-a-twist, anyone-can-die, no-spoilers, the-story-will-never-lead-you-where-you-wanted-to-go bullshit is all about severing that connection. It fundamentally breaks what storytelling is for. And we’ve been saying this for years now and no one seems to be listening.

We can always write the more satisfying outcomes we want in fanfic, but it’s still frustrating and disappointing to see the people who get to make the real TV shows and movies stuffing around like this, and it always results in the ending landing not with a nice firm thump but with a hollow clatter.

gonna throw a bit of a wrench here that you can read as an actual correction or pressure but the article has since been edited:

The article can be found at uproxx