Relatable secondhand-embarrassment quotes from Griffin McElroy on the podcast Rose Buddies:

“This is where my leg bones fused together into a giant drill and I burrowed deep, deep into the crust of the earth so I didn’t have to be in the living room watching this show.”

“My skeleton actually jumped out of my mouth and flushed itself down the toilet so I couldn’t get it back.”

“The episode picks up with Evan going to Amanda and Josh with his fake date card, to interrupt them.” “Yeah, and it also comes back with me, just sort of a bag of skin, just looking out the window at my skeleton, as it crosses the state line into Oklahoma.”

• “At this point my skeleton had poked its head in the front door, just like ‘is everything okay in here?’ ‘NONONONO EVERYTHING’S NOT OKAY’”
  

“Meanwhile I’m at home and I fucking like turn over like a hologram Blastoise card onto the coffee table.”

“I literally threw myself behind the couch as if it were a barrier from an atomic blast.”