Mallory: Oh Please! Burt Reynolds didn't give you a black eye, the floor did! When you fainted like a schoolgirl!
Archer: It was an involuntary reaction mother! To seeing you all tarted up to meet my hero in a hotel bar, for sex!
Mallory: We were meeting for drinks...I mean obviously sex was implied....
Any unusual exposure to radiation?
Mallory Archer: Why the hell were you drinking?
Sterling Archer: Uh, hello it's a party!
Mallory: It's a baby shower! For the bastard child that you humped into a filthy whore!
Trinette: Wait a minute, you liar! This ain't a condom wrapper it's from a candy bar!
Archer: So? Sometimes I like to treat myself.
Trinette: Well sometimes I like to ovulate!
Archer: Well I gotta sleep so do it somewhere else. Money's on the dresser.
