Jared Harris in The Curious Case of Benjamin Button (2008)

current sexual orientation: scruffy boisterous tattooed half-naked ebullient Irish horndog tugboat captain Jared Harris

#THIS IS NOT A DRILL REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
#me messaging cinemaocd when I’d found this I THINK THIS IS IT. THIS IS THE ONE THAT KILLS ME.
#we watched this (jared’s bits - hA) last night and I think my heart rate is still arrhythmic
#holy mother of fuck I mean I DIE really I DIE
#so yeah this started as IMPORTANT RESEARCH because jen is writing valoris fic
#and I am here for helping out in all ways when it comes to research
#especially when it is SO WHAT DOES JARED LOOK LIKE WITHOUT HIS CLOTHES ON
#which is SUPER relevant to Valery because he wears such terrible ill fitting clothes
#and the answer is HE LOOKS FUCKING AMAZING which is of course what we expected
#like there is not enough room on the internet for me to talk about all of what I love in the tags
#but fuck me sideways this is everything I need
#so we were also discussing how because we are OLD AS BALLS and could legitimately bang Jared without it being weird
#that we are doing the terror/chernobyl fandom a favour if we celebrate Jared’s hotness without any embarrassment
#so this is my gift to fandom
#use it wisely
#please mention his freckles in your fic as much as you can
#also his shoulderblades and biceps
#also (if you have seen the other boleyn girl) his remarkably lovely arse
#and the very gingeriness of him because that is the best

So, this post made me so frantically excited i had to calm down for a little while before I could even respond. I mean, the tags, the comments, the reactions. @kiev4am mentioning a Jaws AU in the tags (I 1000% agree that he chanels Quint a lot in some of these GIFs. Most of all in the one where he looks like he is shouting ‘Blanky!’). His superbly suggestive bulge in those long-johns. The idea that there may be a Jared-edit of Benjamin Button out there so I may not have to sit through the whole thing just to drool over Jaz Haz.

This is just. A lot to unpack.

Even now, these two say it best;

Petition to create a library of Jared edits so that no thirsty Harris fan ever has to sit through a whole film for 3 mins of Jaz Haz ever again.

The Jared Harris Thirst Library is the youtube content we need…