#hp

chozenrogue
badcode

magic or mythical deer in film and tv (see also: fucked up deer)

1. Shadow and Bone (2021)
2. Snow White and the Huntsman (2012) dir. Rupert Sanders
3. The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug (2013) dir. Peter Jackson
4. Princess Mononoke (1997) dir. Hayao Miyazaki
5. Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban (2004) dir. Alfonso Cuarón
6. Hannibal 1x03 - “Potage” (2013) dir. David Slade

more deer!shadow and bonesnow white and the huntsmanhannibalhpprincess mononokethe hobbit
haaaaaaaaave-you-met-ted
chucktaylorupset

Important question: Has the wizarding world discovered vaccines and is Hogwarts vaccinated?

chucktaylorupset

Circa Seventh Book

Hermione: Has the wizarding world discovered vaccines?

Ron: A wax what?

Hermione: hmmmm

Harry: Hermione, we cant take out the death eaters with a genetically magicked disease

Hermione: No I know that. Of course I know that.

*Uncomfortably long silence*

achromic-red-dreams-doze-angrily

Harry: What if we gave them all smallpox

Hermione: HARRY NO! We already eradicated it once, let’s not make the world do it again

Harry: Oh yeah, I guess you’re right

Hermione: Now tuberculosis, on the other hand…

achromic-red-dreams-doze-angrily

Hermione: If Voldemort likes the good ole’ days so much, why don’t we bring them back? Old society, old war tricks

Hermione, putting on a gas mask: New plan. We take them out with consumption and mustard gas

Hermione, to Voldemort: Did you know, historically, a majority of war deaths come from disease?

theawkwardgayfanboy

Harry Potter and the Violation of the Geneva Convention

hp
nudityandnerdery
hogwartsaheadcanon

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again since no-one has yet given me a valid reason as to why James Potter, lacking a wand, didn’t just transform into Prongs when Voldy turned up and like… fucking spear him. Why didn’t he do that? Like I don’t care how astonishingly powerful a dark wizard he was, no-one could ever be prepared for walking into a house and there’s just… a massive fuck off stag staring you down? How could you possibly react to that? 

You couldn’t, giving said stag the opportunity to put an antler through his eye and save the day. Not to mention, can you imagine the Prophet headlines if that was how it’d gone down?

jilylicious

Valid reason coming your way….

You need a wand to assume your Animagus form.

warmhappycat

You definitely don’t… Sirius did it in Azkaban.

jilylicious

Aha good point then yeah he should have impaled that motherfucker

justanotherhpfreak

He was unregistrated, right? I mean.. sure, he would have killed the dark lord, but still, it’s a crime. And then there’s the fact that the others were animagi too, which would lead to them being exposed and most certainly being accused of not getting themselves a registration. Their connections to Remus would be obvious, and I think he’d be exposed too. We all learned about the problems lycantrophy causes, and I don’t think James would have been stupid enough to risk that his best friend lost everything.

phoneboxcorgi

To be fair, you try telling the guy who FUCKING IMPALED Voldemort that he had to go to jail for being unregistered.

queenelvendork

Also, it’s the ministry of magic. You could literally say that someone had created a stag by whatever means, and they’d buy it.

hogwartsaheadcanon

Another superlative point—"Where did the stag—yes, it was definitely a stag not a deer note that down please—where did it come from you ask? Oh, absolutely haven’t the foggiest Mister Minister Sir—it was just sort of there. Passing through I suppose.“

”…Passing through.“

“Yes.”

“Through your hallway.”

“Yes.”

“And stabbed Voldemort through the eye.”

“Through the eye, yes, and right through the brain: ghastly stuff, Minister, felt absolutely horrid.”

“It felt horrid?”

“I mean… I imagine so.”

“… right. And where did this deer go?”

“Oh, it vanished, Sir, quite spontaneously.”

“…uhuh. So the stag just wandered into your home, skewered a dark wizard, disapeared, and you saw neither where it came from nor where it went.”

“That’s about the size of it, yes.”


“… Yeah okay that sounds legit job done lads.”

scrabblezard

Also you cannot tell me that James Potter gave two shits about whether or not it was illegal

gryphonrhi

You can’t tell me that Lily wouldn’t say, with a completely straight face, that it was a surprisingly solid Patronus.

joisbishmyoga

James’ best class was Transfiguration.  “I made a stag from the coat stand.”
“Oh, of course.  Excellent job, sir.”

nudityandnerdery

James Potter: “Oh, no, Voldemort is here to kill me! I could defend myself, but… I don’t want to break the law!”

HPHide and Queue
wilwheaton
hogwartscastle

Harry Potter is authorless.

what-even-is-thiss

No. As an English major and a transgender person, no. We do not take this attitude.

Harry Potter is a culturally important work and JK Rowling wrote it.

So many culturally important works of literature were written by people with bad views by today’s and even their time’s standards. Shakespeare? Racist, sexist, islamophobic, xenophobic, anti-Semitic. But we don’t erase his name from those plays. Because if we try and claim that those plays were authorless it gives us an awfully convenient excuse to ignore all of the flaws within them and how we may or may not agree with those flaws on a subconscious level.

In the world of literary analysis these days the author is no longer dead. We don’t do that anymore. The author is a ghost hanging over your shoulder. You can interpret their work any way you want and they can have no say in it. But you as a reader must also acknowledge that their original intentions are there. Their personal history and the times they lived in are there.

JK Rowling wrote that series whether you like it or not. Whether that makes you comfortable or not. Harry Potter is one of the most culturally important book series of the last century and it was written by a transphobe. It was written by JK Rowling. Face up to it. Look it dead in the eye. Recognize its flaws and like it anyways if you still want to. But don’t. I repeat don’t. Do not claim that it is authorless. No work of literature is.

myhufflepuffaesthetic

We're holding JKR accountable like mature adults and embracing the reality though it hurts us to admit something we love was written by someone who continues to dig her grave but we must

HPtransphobiaJKR
emily84
prozdvoices

image

old fundledore’s not doin’ so hot

Original comic by floccinaucinihilipilificationa

For more details about Patreon and monthly personal requests, you can go here.

floccinaucinihilipilificationa

AAAAH YOU DID IT AGAIN (╯✧∇✧)╯ THIS IS LIKE CHRISTMAS BUT BETTER BECAUSE IT IS HAPPENING MORE OFTEN AND WE DON’T HAVE TO EAT MASHED POTATOES

I really really really like your Harry voice! It sounds true to his orginial character (a bold little boy) but is also unique and fits to this version of Harry Potter (little dumpling with a grandma face). You are great at giving a character an unique voice! Thank you very very very much!! :)

HPDumbledore