the signs as types of introvert friends

aries: Death Jokes 24/7, talented but humble, the "doesn't talk much in class" stereotype, but will talk your head off when they get going

taurus: strong hair game, everyone thinks they're an extrovert but boy are they wrong, hella stressed about school, v shy when it comes to romance, "has one drink and is dancing on the table and/or making hella jokes" stereotype

gemini: the Most Humble, will help you if you like it or not, gently checks in on everyone, always a slut for giant sweaters, has Style, everyone loves them, would genuinely cry if you handed them a kitten

cancer: changes major 20 times, listens to nirvana and gets pissed off at "fake fans", tries to skateboard, cannot skateboard, unironically says "well, actually", "loves science more than people" stereotype

leo: failing every class but It's Fine, actually several bags of salt in a trench coat, sense of humor is calling things gay, complains about job 24/7, calls their SO 'Daddy' to make them choke on their food

virgo: has shitty music taste and is embarrassed to have the aux cord, the "drinks to be less shy and gets fucked up" stereotype, genuinely enjoys weird emojis, closet kinkster but also just wants to be cuddled

libra: has a Gay Haircut, a new york hoe, likes fashion but is not fashionable, the "anxious performer" stereotype, uses too many snapchat filters, doesn't know when to shut tf up, extremely unhealthy eating habits

scorpio: soft voiced, loves the moon, can't say no when asked to do stuff, v gentle with animals, talks all kinds of shit when they're around their best friends, hella gay, likes sweaters

sagittarius: compensates for shyness by being overtly sexual, has a secret talent, will do anything to help friends in need, wants everyone to feel included, is actually a skilled leader but still anxious 24/7

capricorn: prides themself on being fake, can write well, loves kids and/or animals, has never been drunk, posts 100 pictures of their pets, memelord, camera roll is just full of selfies and dog pics

aquarius: thinks they're Mysterious, isn't, likes gardening, probably writes embarrassing fanfic, "would rather die than dance in public" stereotype, never does homework, attracted to "over-confident" people

pisces: likes to sing, is "straight", still into superwholock, screams hamilton in public, "goes out but complains the whole time" stereotype, embraces their awkwardness, ships gay ships and calls it "sinning"

The Signs at their Best / The Signs at their Worst

Aries at their best: Full of life, adventurous and with a bright light in their eyes - a light bright enough to make all darkness disappear. Challenging, caring and with a big smile on their face. Admiring all beauty they can see, their head filled with plans. Nothing could ever bring them down, nothing could come between them and whatever it is that they want.

Aries at their worst: Doubting themselves in a very destructive way. They think it's all their fault and that they can't make anyone truly happy. Reckless. Cannot be reached by anyone, no one knows what's going on inside their head. Harsh. Don't care if they hurt someone's feelings or not. Don't care at all.

Taurus at their best: Absolute sweethearts with a great wits. Their heart is only open wide for people they choose carefully because they know it's for their own good. They know what's good for them and they're confident because they know what they're capeable of. A true and fair winner. Caring, charming, funny, intelligent, affectionate.

Taurus at their worst: They seem cold and careless. They know how to use words when they want to cause pain with them and they do that. Doubting themselves, suddenly lost all their confidence. Can't really control their feelings and tend to explode. Not looking after themselves and their loved ones because they're busy being stuck in a bad mood but deep down they're very very sorry for it.

Gemini at their best: A head full of ideas, a chest full of life. Up to something great, smiling, laughing, telling jokes, telling the greatest stories. Caring, motivating and inspiring. Freedom-loving, passionate about life, creative. Helpful, knows how to cheer you up. They don't run out of energy, they keep going.

Gemini at their worst: There is no sparkle in their eyes. Their hands are cold and their look is empty. Everything bores them, bothers them or sucks the life out of their bones. They don't see or hear anything, they're lost in thoughts. Get mean easily, say things they don't mean. Hurt others on purpose but end up hurting themselves. Self-pitying, over-emotional or not showing any emotion.

Cancer at their best: Brave people of good heart. Kind and caring, spreading love and good vibes. They fight for what they want, they always have something to say. Generous, understanding, shining as bright as the sun. A smile that makes others smile. They are very strong and handle their emotions wisely. Not to be underestimated.

Cancer at their worst: Say or do things they regret immediately. Forget to take care of themselves. They don't talk to anyone, don't reply. They tend to put themselves under an enormous emotional pressure. May manipulate others or completely lock themselves away.

Leo at their best: The literal sun. They shine so bright even when they're not smiling. Their laugh echoes, everybody hears it. Very proud, ambitious, kind, fair and loving. Bring happiness wherever they go, bring light into the dark. Full of dreams and very intelligent. The one that makes a boring evening a perfect one. Protective and they have a great sense of humour.

Leo at their worst: Believing themselves to be not good enough, doubting themselves and suffering from it. Harsh and kind of cold. Their look is still powerful and you dare not to speak to them. They drift away, may get mean or change their mind really quick because they just don't know what they want and it frustrates them so much.

Virgo at their best: Really good at doing what they love to do. Happy to spend time with people they like, generous and gentle, wise, gives great advices. Takes hints, makes great surprises and knows how to comfort people. Full of life and they have a great wits. The one that keeps you grounded. Honest and fair.

Virgo at their worst: Causing pain or worries to others to release themselves from it. They may be manipulative and self-pitying, exaggerating and not really speaking up. They tend to make decisions they will regret later. They forget how clever they are or they doubt their skills and their intelligence and make themselves smaller than they are.

Libra at their best: A great supporter. Someone with an eye for beauty, a charming smile and an amazing aura. They are funny, full of ideas and spontaneous. Remember little things and can easily make others happy what they love to do. Very creative, honest and they have a wild soul.

Libra at their worst: Moody, not seeing themselves as the masterpiece they are. Letting everybody know how they feel. Cold and feeling incredibly bad about it. They just hide away from the world and won't let anything come close to them. In pain just because they see all the flaws in their lives although there may not even be some.

Scorpio at their best: Passionate, strong, strong-willed, skilled and loving. They are full of secrets which is why they can keep secrets like no one else. An entire universe for themselves. They don't care about limits but in a good way. They share their ideas and dreams and cheer others up.

Scorpio at their worst: Neglecting their friends, their family, their duties and themselves. Reckless and not saying much about it. Things that usually fascinate them do not fascinate them anymore and they feel like nothing could ever make them smile again. Everything they love starts seeming so irrelevant to them.

Sagittarius at their best: Funny, uplifting, full of life and good energy. They don't care what anyone thinks of them, they will dance to loud music whenever they feel like it. They are open minded and interested in things, prepared to stand up for what they believe in at any time.

Sagittarius at their worst: Feeling depressed and not able to explain it, express it or talk about it. Over emotional and hot tempered, about to explode although they don't always know why. About to yell at someone for little things although they don't want to. Tired of everything.

Capricorn at their best: A guardian angel. Always there when you need them, glad to help. Caring for themselves and really moving things. Know how to use words and what to say in any situation. Working on something great, motivating others, taking care of people.

Capricorn at their worst: Sarcastic and they just shut everything down. Maybe bitter over something, maybe making others upset, too. Seem to have given up. Not sure what to do or what to say. Doubting themselves deep down but not willing to admit it. Not showing any emotions.

Aquarius at their best: An actual source of energy. Always have the greatest plans and ideas, dislike boredom. They love communicating and meeting new people, seeing new places. Curious about life, wanting to explore the world. Lift others up with their presence only.

Aquarius at their worst: Complaining over everything and annoying others with it. They don't care about anything anymore, reckless. Do not care anymore and do their own thing even though it might not be good for them. Ignoring others and feeling empty deep down. Like they ran out of energy.

Pisces at their best: Supporting others, taking care of others but also of themselves. Very clever, know what to say, funny. Their fantasy knows no limits and they're very productive. Do art or listen to music. Make others smile and fascinate them. Playing their own little games. Inspired.

Pisces at their worst: Feeling incredibly sad because of how the world is. Manipulative and stubborn. Actually dangerous because you just can't tell what they're up to. Revengeful. They have no energy and feel powerless, underestimated and not treated how they think they should be treated.

the "totally adorable but also basically Satan" squad

Scorpio, Libra, Sagittarius, Pisces, Cancer, Gemini

the zodiac signs as Stan Pines quotes

Aries: "The word please doesn't make me any money, kid."

Taurus: "When there's no cops around, anything's legal!"

Gemini: "Sounds like something a responsible parent wouldn't want you doing... Good thing I'm an uncle. Avenge me, kids! AVENGE ME!"

Cancer: "Finally, a good reason to punch a teenager in the face."

Leo: "You see, it's, it's funny because marriage is terrible!"

Virgo: "Yes, YES! Burn the child!"

Libra: "I was awoken by the sound of mockery. Where is it? Show me the object of ridicule."

Scorpio: "Wash off the shame, Stan. Wash off the shame."

Sagittarius: "Would it be wrong to punch a child?"

Capricorn: "Well! I learned nothing."

Aquarius: "Darn beautiful men! Always eating out of my trash."

Pisces: "Road safety laws, prepare to be ignored!"